Raleigh Boudoir

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The Boudoir Equivalent to a "Spend The Night Bag" | Packing the Perfect Boudoir Bag

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Is it the night before your boudoir shoot and you have no clue what you’re supposed to bring for the big day? Keep on reading to learn the must haves to pack in what we like to call your “spend the night bag.” Are you the type to pack four bags for a weekend trip or the type to throw a couple things in a backpack and call it a day? Whichever you are, we’ll tell you everything to bring and why! Now, let me be your guide.

Let’s start simple with the one or two looks you need to bring for your session. As you know, you are more than welcome to borrow looks from the extensive client closet in our studio, but we do ask that you have one or two looks! My number one recommendation is always going to be your favorite bra and panty set! Bring something that makes you feel so comfy, so sexy, so fine. Need to order something? Make sure to check out our lingerie buying guide! A simple set creates timeless photos and can even be worn under one of the fluffy robes we have in studio! Whether laid across a bed or posing upright wrapped in a sheet, a simple bra and pantie set will give you the relaxed look you’re going for.

Let’s say you can’t find that classic bra and panty set, then what? Well, how about a big oversized sweater? Your favorite jamies? Or that large t-shirt of your partners that you sleep in every single night! All of those bring the cozy vibes we are looking for and allows us to get photos from all different perspectives of you. There are so many vibes you can bring to a shoot and why not try a few of them out? Let's get that sexy bombshell and then transition to your sweet side. What does a comfy outfit look like for you? In my world it’s either my favorite sweats that accentuate my booty with a tank top! Bring what makes you feel like a cozy bad ass.

Now that we have the wardrobe pieces packed, let’s chat about the accessories. In the studio wardrobe there are a few options for jewelry to borrow, but make sure to pack the earrings, bracelets and sparkly things that make you feel delicious. There are no wrong answers when it comes to bobbles and it is better to be over packed. Also make sure you are packing any heels, boots or footwear you want to wear during your shoot. A high heel can spice up any outfit so bring those smutty heels you can’t walk in. We will put them to great use! Lastly, throw in any significant accessories that might personalize your sessions. If you are doing this as a wedding gift, bring your veil! Have a special tie your partner loves? Bring it. Have a piece of fabric that holds a special memory? Let’s include it. This is where you can get creative and spice up the session in a way that is genuine and authentic to you!

Ok, so we have the wardrobe and accessories knocked out, so let's talk about that glow. Hopefully you’ve already read the “Pre Shoot Do’s and Don'ts” blog but if you haven’t, make sure to read that next! Taking care of your skin before a shoot is so important! So when you moisturize the night before your shoot, throw all that stuff in your bag to have on hand at your session. Think lotion, chapstick, dry oil or anything that you use to keep you skin hydrated and glowing. Fun tip, applying chapstick about an hour before you apply lipstick (if you choose) will keep the color from cracking. Especially if you go with a matte lip. Moisturized and supple skins photographs really well so come prepared with all the goodies!

Cosmetics time! When you get to your shoot, hair and makeup will need to be photoshoot ready, but touch ups will for happen throughout the session. Not only are these sessions pretty long, but you also have to remember that we will be changing, trying lingerie on and moving about so it is bound to get a little messy. Most people have a to-go bag of makeup so bring that if you have it, otherwise think of the essentials like mascara, eyebrow pencils, foundation, concealer, blush, contour, lipstick etc. Anything that can move or get smudged needs to be in the bag. Better safe than sorry.

I also highly, highly endorse false lashes for your photoshoot. They add so much to your look on and off camera. I know that when I wear lashes, I feel like I can conquer the world. Don’t know how to apply lashes but you want to wear them for your shoot? Practice makes perfect. Buy a set or two of cheap false lashes and pull up a youtube tutorial! My favorite is, “False Eyelashes 101: Select, Apply, Remove, Clean” by Emily Noel. I usually skip to about 3min 30sec into the video. Just remember that if you are wearing false lashes, you HAVE TO BRING the glue with you. Those little guys can be super squirmy, so the glue is a safety precaution. That is a must have in your boudie bag.

Lastly, let’s chat about hair. If you are like me, I never know what to do with my hair. If you don’t want to think about any of this, you can for sure add hair and makeup with one of our preferred vendors. But if you’re doing your own hair, don’t forget your styling tools! Whether straight or curly, you’ll want to make sure you have everything you need for touch ups. Bring your favorite curling iron or straightener to maintain the look you want through your session. We play with hair a lot here and I am on board for that messy “bed head” look, but some people aren't. Toss some hair products in your bag for the finishing touches and you’re good to go!

My biggest tip: make a list of everything you need to pack. As you pack your bag, cross each item off the list and double check that you have everything! I also send you a welcome guide when you book your session, so make sure to read through that and pack the night before your session. A calm, cool and relaxed morning is the best way to prep for your shoot! If you have any additional questions email me at katelyn@katelynscott.com, I would be happy to help!

Embrace all bodies, especially the one you are in.

Love,

Samantha and Katelyn, the Embrace All Bodies team





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Pre-Shoot Do’s And Dont’s | From a Raleigh Boudoir Company

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In the days leading up to your shoot, you may be lost on how to prepare. That’s totally normal my friend! Don’t worry, I’m here to help. In the week leading up to a photoshoot there are some things you can do to boost your confidence and guide you to the shoot of your dreams. Remember, this day will be all about you, your unique body, and your vibrant spirit. Now let's jump into some of the do’s and dont’s for preparing for your shoot!

Let’s start with skincare. What’s your skincare routine? You might have your daily routine and maybe a regime you use before a big event. Don’t stray from what you know. New products and methods can aggravate your skin and result in a complexion that may not make you feel like your most confident self. Things like exfoliating and moisturizing add a glow you can feel. I know that after a good exfoliation and moisture I walk around feeling beautiful and powerful! Another question for you. Do you get spray tans? If so, it’s a good idea to get that tan refreshed before your shoot. Just make sure you give it a few days if you will be working with white sheets. If you are not a regular at the tanning salon, it’s recommended that you don’t experiment with spray tans before your shoot as you might not be as happy with the outcome. Remember, your most authentic self shines the brightest!

When it comes to hair and makeup, it’s important to express yourself. If you want to go full glam, go for it! Don’t forget we also love to see a bare faced beauty. To glam or not to glam is up to you! If you decide to wear makeup, overdo it a little. The camera loves when you make it a little more dramatic. Choose the look you love and run with it! Long haired loves, loose curls are a fan favorite. Short haired friends, we love when you go with your usual style. For those doing their own hair and makeup, make sure to have it done before you walk into the studio. If you go the route of using a professional hair and makeup artist, make sure to have clean hair and a clean face. It’s way easier to work with. You’re going to look and feel amazing. 

Don’t forget to feed that body! You might be tempted to skip a meal before your shoot but remember: food is fuel and you are using a lot of mental and physical energy when you're workin’ it in the studio. Our bodies change throughout the day as we eat and drink and that's totally okay! To be honest, I love when I have a food baby. It reminds me that I am taking care of my body, the only oneI have. If you decide to exercise in the days leading up to your shoot, take it easy. You don’t want to be crazy sore while posing for that camera. I want you to have the most comfortable experience possible.

The most important thing when it comes to your shoot is that you’re comfortable, empowered, and representing your beautifully authentic self. I hope this article gave you some helpful information for the next time you step into the studio! Be strong, be vibrant, be you. I know you’ll crush this shoot.  

Embrace all Bodies, especially the one that you are in.

Love,

Samantha and Katelyn, the Embrace All Bodies team




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Embrace All Bodies | Dear Closet Fat Shamers

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Dear Closet Fat Shamers,

This blog post has been weighing on my heart for a few weeks and it’s been hard to write because it is a vulnerable topic that generates strong opinions. I will preface this with the simple statement that I am writing these words from a place of love so I hope you read them as such. I am not here to tell you what you should or shouldn’t believe but I am the kind of person that wants to help educate people if they are unintentionally offending someone. So here goes.

In the last two weeks I have had to block account after account on social media for blatant fat shaming. What scares me is that I don’t think the people creating the content are intentionally trying to hurt anyone, but they are. Fat shaming has two faces. The person who outwardly trolls people (yuck, don’t ever be that human) and the more lethal version, the person who doesn’t know any better. The second is usually disguised as the person who wants you to be healthier, encourages you to participate in a different life style or wants “better” for you. They come across the screen hidden behind a curtain of concern for your health, appearance or a plethora of other reasons.

The post usually sport a very sad “before” photo on one side and a joyful “after” photo on the other. The caption reads something like “Sally has reclaimed her health after losing 45 pounds! Give her a shout out!”. Or “John has really been working hard on his appearance, way to take back your swag!”. The post may vary in severity but the two common pieces are:

  1. In the before photo they are portrayed as fat, unhappy and unhealthy

  2. In the after photo they are portrayed as skinnier, happier and assumed healthier

Do you see why that’s a problem? Even though these posts come across as a celebration, the underlying message is that only a thin body is allowed to be happy. Only a thin body is allowed to be healthy. Only a thin body is worthy of the pride and joy shown in the after photo. The root of the issue is that we have no idea if Jane was healthy before but as a society we assume that smaller is healthier. For John, we couldn’t compliment his appearance before because that is only reserved for smaller bodies. To add insult to injury, people then feed into the narrative with praise, ultimately validating the message that thinner is better. This is a problem.

People are going to have different opinions and reactions to what I just said. I’m ok with that. The argument is usually the same. You don’t want better for Sally and John? You don’t want to celebrate them? You don’t want them to live a healthier life style? Or be happier? My answer is yes to all of it! The difference is, I want to celebrate them no matter what the exterior looks like. I never want anyones happiness to be tied to the antiquated opinion our society has formed that they can only achieve those things with a smaller body. I want to help people see that there can be so MUCH joy, pride and happiness in whatever body you are currently living. This shouldn’t be a luxury reserved for only what society sees as thin.

I write all this to help people see that when a “before” photo is posted, it implies THAT body is not worthy. This is a slippery slope because you are promoting the message that anyone in that size body is not worthy. Stop and close your eyes here with me. Think about who in your life has a body that looks like yours or is bigger. Is it your daughter, your son, your wife, your aunt, your grandma, someone you love, someone you respect? If the answer is yes, this is your chance to change the narrative and I am lovingly inviting you to start.

What you post, the words that you use and how you talk about yourself do just as much harm to those around you. If your words about your body are negative and you love someone who has a larger body, you are DEFINITELY doing damage and that person will most likely never tell you. They will just hide it away in their brain under the file tab “they hate their small body so I can’t imagine what they think of my bigger body”. Even though you are not openly fat shaming them, you unintentionally are from the comfort of your closet.

Words matter, images matter and what you say about your body or other bodies matters. A simple thing like a before and after photo can do so much unintended harm. Society tells us that smaller is better and it’s time to rewrite that ending. If you are guilty of shaming from your safe space, it’s ok. Society did it’s job and trained you well. If you didn’t know any better, you do now and please accept this as a form of forgiveness. All I ask is that you acknowledge your part and don’t continue to feed into the cycle. It can change and having the knowledge to do so is the way out.

Embrace all bodies, especially the one you are in.

Cheers and Love,

Katelyn

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Embrace all Bodies | These Wings were Built to Fly

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Wings and boudoir. What comes to mind when you think of wings….and boudoir? If you had asked me two years ago I would have said something like “oh those gorgeous fairy wings that are strapped to the backs of the Vicky Secret Angels that float down the runway!” You all know the kind I’m talking about, they are etherial and dainty and not worth a damn in regards to actually flying. Ya, those. The equivalent of a penguin wing. Cute, pretty but completely useless for actually getting off the ground. Today, we are going to chat about wings….but I don’t want to talk about the wings that keep a woman helplessly tied down, I want to talk about the wings that actually help women fly.

When I started this boudoir journey in November of 2017 I had no idea what I was doing. Let’s be honest, who decides to jump into croc infested water with no boat and no paddle? I was a completely green boudoir photographer who didn’t know the first thing about posing, lighting, what makes a woman feel good or where to start. What I DID know was that I was yearning to leave an industry that played into the stereotypical bullshit of what makes a woman pretty. Thin face, flat tummy, big boobs, fake and photoshopped. I would leave a wedding I just shot and ache for the mother of the bride who spent the entire day bashing her appearance. I wanted to hug her and say “sis, your baby girl is getting married today. Put that worry and weight down for a minute and just enjoy the day.” Instead I would get in my truck and hurt. Women wanted me to transform them into something they were not and I just knew something had to change…..so I jumped into that croc infested canyon with faith and hope.

Growing up, women are not taught to jump, let alone fly. We are taught to make smart, calculated decisions. Go to school, get good grades, sneak under the radar, don’t be too big, too messy, too aggressive and the whole time remember to be pretty. Smile so people don’t think you are cold, but don’t smile too big because they may assume something. Fit into the pretty box that society built for you, but for goodness sakes don’t customize that box. Our wings were clipped the day we were born and it has hindered our ability to trust those wings when it comes time to actually fly. It has kept us below that shroud of what society expects and has created a toxic stink that says women will never be good enough just the way they are. I’m here to say fuck that noise. Your wings may be clipped sis, but they aren’t broken. We have wings the size of that dragon on Game of Thrones (nope I don’t watch the show, but those wings looked enormous). Which means we have been told a lie our entire lives. Not only can you jump, but babe we can FLY! Our wings may be clipped but do you really think a dragon that goes around burning cities to the ground is going to notice a little chip in her wing? Nope, she sure as shit isn’t, so channel that inner dragon and spread them wings. It’s time.

Why does this matter to me right now? Here is why. In the last two years I have jumped several times with no regard for the hard landing. I spread my clipped wings on hope and faith that they were going to catch me and guess what…..they did. I have learned to pursue my passion in such a big way that I will absolutely move heaven and earth to help women stretch their big giant dragon wings out and fly. If that means turning away from traditional photography to pursue body positive boudoir, then so be it. If that means presenting women with authentic images in a world that is fake and photoshopped, then so be it. If that means moving to Denver and then back in less than a 6 month period, then so be it. I continue to spread my wings and jump, learning on the way down that I can do anything. Someone has to show the women of our generation just how powerful their wings are so I will make this choice 10 times out of 10 with zero regret. If I can jump and make it work, then so can you…I promise.

If this thought is scary to you, then good. Jumping from anything without the promise of a safety net will make anyones butt clench, but what is your alternative? Stay in a life that is not meant for you? Hide your body so people can’t judge you? Cover up to protect people’s emotions? Keep quiet so no one can judge your opinion? What does that leave you with? Nothing but a sad reality, covered in the slim that society continues to throw our way to keep our wings wet. You are a dragon sis and it’s time for you to start exploring all the tall buildings and mountains and obstacles that you can throw your beautiful self off of just to watch your wings catch you. I jumped into the scary crock infested waters and didn’t get eaten because my wings were there to support me, clipped and all. Whatever your scary canyon is, jump. If that’s sitting for a boudoir session for the first time, asking for a promotion, speaking up rather than staying quite or pursuing another huge dream, just do it!! I am here to soar right along with you and we both know how scary a pissed off woman with wet wings and a chip on her shoulder is. Hang up those fairy wings and strap on your big nasty dragon wings. It’s our time ladies, so let’s spread our wings and conquer the world.

Embrace all bodies, especially the one you are in.

Love

Katelyn


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Embrace All Bodies | Raleigh, Durham Body Positive Boudoir - Body Love Is For All Women

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A Story About Me

Raleigh, Durham Body Positive Boudoir - Body Love Is For All Women

Take a long hard look at that body pictured above. Make sure to take in all the rolls, dimples, sweet meat and curves. To some, this may be a picture of beauty, to others it may be a shame trigger that plays into their own fear and vulnerability. In my eyes, I see a woman sitting in her power, basking in the truth that she is enough. Yes, I know it’s me and that may be a biased opinion, but y’all, it has taken a long time to be able to show this side of me to the world. A. Long. Ass. Time. Body positivity is not easy nor for the faint of heart. Trust me, I used to be my biggest critic. I grew up as a larger than normal human and the concept of “body positive” missed me. The boat sailed on that journey and I didn’t even know where the dang harbor was to get on the ship. In my eyes, body positive was reserved for the people who actually had “nice bodies” that were worthy of love.

I’m going to be real honest and raw in this blog and it is going to rub some people wrong. I am ok with that. I have spent a lot of my days trying to make myself smaller to fit into the box that society says women should fit into. We all know that box, it looks so neat and clean from the outside. Just small enough to not be noticeable. Never a crazy color. And NEVER too loud. Well sis, let me tell you, to me that box has always felt like the Fat Guy in a Little Coat scene from the movie Tommy Boy. If I finally got myself in the box then the back blew out, or the side smooshed open, or the folds gave out. Until I started this journey, I spent a lot of time worried about how I was going to shrink my being to fit the box, when in reality I just needed to order a bigger damn box.

This story starts back in the days of elementary school when, in the 3rd grade, I wore a woman’s size 9 shoe and was shopping in the old lady section because all the cute little girl stuff was either too small or not long enough. I was a head taller than almost every boy in my grade and the next three grades above me. I towered over my best friends who were all so little and adorable. They could go to sleep overs and share clothes, play dress up with their life size Barbies and buy matching best friend shirts. When we finally did find those gross jelly shoes everyone wore in the 90’s in my size, it was like a rare gem stone. So much so that my mom nearly killed herself falling into Trinity Lake to save one, and no I can’t make this stuff up. Looking back as an adult, I know just how amazing my parents were through this weird time, but it didn’t matter. I was an outlier. Not one of the cool girls because I couldn’t physically fit myself into the mold….I was just too big.

Fast forward through the horrible days of junior high when we started to notice boys for the first time. I was the girl who played sports and rough housed with all the dudes, not someone they saw as an option to date. I will never forget the horrible feeling of getting up the nerve to ask Sean out and have it spread like fire through the school that he shot me down. Why? Well in my brain it was because I was a big fat ass who was too loud and sweat too much. At that age what did it matter what the real reason was? I was standing in my wilderness all alone and couldn’t see through the trees.

Skip to High School when I grew several inches over the summer and was playing travel ball. I went from the 180 pound undatable girl to a 5’10” stunner who was squeezing into a size 4 jean. Yep, I weighed in at 135 pounds and was nearly the same height I am today. My shirts were a medium and I could shop for jeans at the stores my friends did. Man I thought I was hot shit. In my brain I had figured out the secret formula to fit into the box. Eat less and work yourself to death. Literally. If I ate something bad during the day I would throw myself to the ground and do sit ups. I spent hours of my life with my shirt pulled up looking in the mirror to make sure you could still see my hip bones. I fit into the mold and it was all happening for me. Boys started to notice me. Girls in the hall would stop me and tell me how good I looked. Things like “on wow what did you do over the summer? You look amazing” were being thrown around and it fueled an unhealthy desire to stay the size I was. It got so bad that through my sophomore year I stopped having a period….but I fit in the box for the first time of my life.

Jump to the junior college years when I was playing basketball, living on my own and progressing the unhealthy habits I had started in high school. I was in the best shape of my life and still fell into a trap of feeling soooooo inadequate. It lead me to make horrible decisions about who I dated and things I did because I was just craving the high of fitting in. Same thing happened at my four year college. Physically, I couldn’t have been in a better place and it was never enough. I was eating the garbage that society was cramming down my throat and didn’t know any better. Looking back now my heart hurts for that girl. She was broken and sad and covered it all with a positive spin and a smile. Fake it till you make it. It was all I ever knew.

That brings me to the here and now. As dark as those days were, there was a lot of light that broke through the clouds. I had an amazing support system in my parents and never once did I feel pressure from them to look a certain way. That allowed me the opportunity to learn from a safe and comfortable place that no matter how you slice it, society has a messed up standard for what is expected of us. It’s not fair or right and I am here to tell you that as unhealthy as my journey was, I made it out the other side. Going through that has given me the opportunity to reach back and help women that are stuck in the quick sand spiral of body shaming….because until about a year and a half ago I was sitting in the same pool drinking the hate martini’s right with you. I get it sis.

The good news, the Body Positive movement has officially started and wahoo for that! Women are finally learning that they can give themselves the permission they never had to love themselves. The box that society hands you can be returned for a larger size, or shape, or color. If that doesn’t make you want to kick up your heals and put your sexy undies on I don’t know what will. It is our time and that is something more magical than Michael B Jordan in Creed (insert drooling unicorn emoji). Society does not have the right to dictate what your meter is for acceptance. That is something you can control and THAT is a powerful thing.

I want to wrap this up with a very clear and uplifting message. There is not just one type of body that is allowed the freedom to express body love or body positivity. By my definition this applies to all women who have experienced hatred for their being. Fat, skinny, tall, short, wide, broad, narrow, saggy, tight, this movement is for ALL women…ESPECIALLY those that have walked through a similar journey, stood in their wilderness and felt alone. Through my lens, you don’t have to be a certain size to hate your body, that hate is size blind, vicious and needs no help from us. So instead of fighting about who can or can’t be a part of this movement, let us take a moment and just encourage all women to love themselves unconditionally. Body positivity is for me, you and every woman in this word who is ready to buck the system. Stand tall pretty girl and bask in the power that comes from self acceptance. You are so worthy of this love.

Embrace ALL bodies, especially the one you are in!


Love always,

Katelyn